Last updated on September 30th, 2021 at 10:19 am
To help parents and their kids get ready to go back to school this fall, the ladies at Marvelously Well‐Mannered, an Arlington, VA‐based etiquette expert firm, have compiled the following FAQs and fun multiple choice answers, in the style of their manners game Kindness Kingdom.
1. What if I forget my teacher’s or classmates’ names? Is it rude to ask them to remind me of their name?
A. Yes, you never want to let others know you can’t remember names. So just call them, “Hey buddy.”
B. No, it’s not rude. Everyone forgets names from time to time so just smile and ask.
C. Yes, it is rude to ask them their names so just ignore them until you remember the names.
Answer: B. It is not rude to ask someone to please remind you of their name. If you just met, you can state your name again too in case they forgot your name and say, “Hi, I am Sally and what is your name again?” If it is someone you have met a few times before, say something your remember about them and then ask them their name. For example, “I am so glad we are on the soccer team together. I am sorry, but my mind just went blank, what is your name again?” By doing so, you let them know you remember them even though you forgot their name.
2. What should I do if my locker or desk is next to someone I don’t like?
A. Turn your back and completely ignore them.
B. Make faces at them and leave mean notes in their locker or desk until they leave.
C. Be polite and treat them the way you would like to be treated.
Answer: C. At school, and in life, you don’t and won’t be friends with everyone. But you should treat everyone with respect by following the Golden Rule of treating others the way you would like to be treated. If you just don’t like them you can be pleasant but not fake friendly. If you don’t like them because they are very mean or bully you, talk to your teacher.
3. What should I do if I hate the school lunch they serve?
A. Yell at the employees in the cafeteria, “I wouldn’t feed this to my dog!”
B. Take a “no thank you taste” to see if there is anything you like.
C. Try to trade food the other kids brought in from home.
Answer: B. You should start every day off right with a good breakfast to help make it through the busy school day. Keep in mind, if you are buying your lunch at school you may not have the ability to choose what you eat. In that case, you get what you get and you don’t get upset. Take what is served, smile and “thank” the cafeteria staff for making and serving it. Lunchtime is a good time to try new foods by taking small bites; who knows you may learn you actually like it. Even if you don’t like it, you are not allowed to make a fuss – it’ is rude. Make sure you drink your beverage and ask for a snack when you get home. If you find you often don’t like the school served lunches, ask your parent if you can bring your lunch, and then learn how to pack your own lunch.
4. How can I invite school friends to a party outside of school without hurting other people’s feelings for those I can’t or don’t want to invite?
A. Send invitations directly to each friend you are inviting and don’t talk about your party
in front of the children you aren’t inviting.
B. Hand out invitations at school when you think no one is looking.
C. Have your two best friends whisper the party details to the other kids you invite.
Answer. If you are not inviting your entire class – or all the girls or all the boys in your class as the case may be, don’t do the inviting when you are at school. Instead send your invitations – ideally paper invites but they can also send cute e‐vites – directly to each friend you want to invite. Not everyone is allowed to, nor does everyone want to, have a large birthday party. In that case, simply follow the Golden Rule and treat the children you are not inviting the way you would want to be treated. Don’t talk about the party in front of the uninvited ones and don’t post about it on Facebook when you know some of your “friends” aren’t invited. Such activity will only make them feel badly and makes you look bad too. If an uninvited child hears about the party and asks you how come they weren’t invited, you can say you are only having a small party and unfortunately could not invite everyone. But when saying that, make sure you aren’t excluding only that child. That’s just not nice.
5. What should I do if another kid shows up at school in the same outfit as me?
A. Run to the school nurse and tell her you need to go home because you are “sick of wearing the same outfit as someone else.”
B. Go over to the other kid and meanly say, “What makes you think you are pretty enough to wear this outfit? I look so much better than you!”
C. Walk over with a smile and say, “I love your great taste in clothes!”
Answer: C. Having a good sense of humor is a wonderful thing and this is one instance where you need one. Be confident and gracious about the situation. Soon everyone will be focusing on something else and not your outfit.
Check in with their blog and helpful website frequently. And when in a pinch, reach out to them with your own etiquette question to www.MarvelouslyWell-Mannered.com.