Last updated on August 8th, 2024 at 03:39 pm
Nat chats with Dr. Carolina Giacobone, a twin mom and general psychiatrist specializing in perinatal psychiatry, about her personal complex grief experience with her mother’s declining health during her pregnancy and losing her mother a few weeks after her twins were born. They also discuss the importance of mental health during pregnancy and parenthood and advocate for reaching out for help if you need it.
Today’s podcast is sponsored by Dr. Brown’s.
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Handling Complex Grief While Raising Twins | Twin Mom Dr. Carolina Giacobone
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Dr. Carolina Giacobone, MD, is a General Psychiatrist specializing in Perinatal Psychiatry. She is also an Integrative Psychotherapist, writer, and researcher. Dr. Giacobone lives in Dublin with her family. Find her on Instagram @perinatal.psychiatry.
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Top 3 Pieces of Advice for Other Parents of Twins
- Do not despair. Raising twins is a challenge for us all. At times, we feel like we don’t have time for both of them, that their demands are overwhelming, that exhaustion will get the best of us. In truth, we were given a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to see two little human beings grow before us. They will love us despite our struggles, they will appreciate all our good intentions, they will know we are doing our best. So try not to despair and enjoy the ride!
- Celebrate their differences. My twins aren’t identical, although most people think they are. It doesn’t matter if they identical or fraternal, it’s incredibly important we highlight their differences, to allow them to develop individually while they foster that unique bond very few siblings have. I find beauty every day in how each one of them is become a distinct little girl, with their own preferences, characters, voices, even choice of clothes and toys!
- Connect with other twin parents. Not many of us are on the same boat, having twins is rare. Few people will understand, so don’t be afraid to reach out to other twin parents for advice, to share stories, to ask questions, and surely to complain about our shared struggles.
Need some baby safety training? Take the Twiniversity Complete Baby Safety course, offered on-demand. Includes video modules on infant, toddler, and child CPR, first aid, and common medical ailments, plus car seat installation and safety and childproofing your home. Click here to learn more!
Top 3 Things You’d Like Our Listeners to Take away After Listening to Your Story
- Grief needs to be normalized. Complex grief isn’t a medical illness, it’s a human reaction to a devastating loss. Grief doesn’t make you less of a parent, quite the contrary, it will show you depths of emotions you haven’t experienced before. We need to talk about grief, normalize grief, break the taboo against grief and loss.
- It is ALWAYS OK to ask for help. Please, if you’re struggling with your mental health, with parenthood, with anything really, don’t suffer in silence. There are plenty of resources out there to support your journey, and there’s no shame in asking for help. Speaking up is always a sign of courage and resilience.
- You are NEVER alone. Yes, as a twin parent, and as a bereaved parent, you might feel astoundingly lonely. It’s terrifying how misunderstood we feel, but I have learned we are not alone. So many people genuinely understand, particularly in certain online groups and pages, which is a wonderful way of connecting when we’re suffering the most. Your pain doesn’t have to be yours only.
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First Year With Twins
Are your twins in their first year? Check out our free First Year with Twins resource to learn tips, advice, and ideas for getting through your first year with twins!
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Subscribe for FREE to our other podcast, the Twins Tale Podcast, giving you an inside look at feeding schedules, sleep struggles, and all the highs and lows of raising twins from birth to college age.
Take a class! Twiniversity offers online expecting twins classes, a breastfeeding twins class, and a baby safety class including CPR, first aid, car seat safety, and childproofing. Click here to check out our online classes.
