5 Things No One Ever Told Me About Being A #BoyMom

Last updated on August 3rd, 2023 at 10:38 pm

First off…. Boys! Ew! Stinky smelly dirty boys. Right? No! Boys LOVE. THEIR. MOMMAS!! If you are currently a #boymom then you know how much this is true. You are in fact, their first love. And that is every #BoyMom’s favorite!

I am a child of the 80s. Better yet, a little girl of the 80s… Big hair bows, Cabbage Patch Kids, Barbies, and neon nail polish. I grew up as a single child and now I have two little boys that constantly wrestle, talk about poop, play with Transformers, and eat everything in sight. This is completely foreign to me.

It baffles me that people would want to beat each other up from sun up ’til sun down. It completely throws me for a loop that a family member, YOUR family member, your TWIN, would want to sit on your head. You would think it’s funny. Where in their genetics does it say it’s okay to hold your brother down and tickle him until he pees his pants? If you are a #boymom, multitasking means cooking dinner while trying to get one little boy NOT to shoot the other little boy in the butt with a nerf gun. When those little dudes are born, everyone offers advice but no one is quite able to prepare you for the world of little boys. Where burps and farts are funny, eating is competitive, and wrestling is an art form.

You know the old saying, “Boys will be boys.” I always told myself if I had boys, “My boys WILL NOT act that way!” But I’m kinda starting to realize some of it just comes with the territory. As long as we teach them to do their chores, love their mothers, and respect women with a fierceness, a little wrestling and burp jokes will be okay as long as they are respectful and polite.

So here are 5 things I’ve learned since becoming a #BoyMom

1. Potty mouth

Boys love burps, farts, and the word POOP! I never said POOP before having children. Then, of course, my husband and I had to discuss the color of poop that our new twins were having every day (because hey, that’s what new parents do right?)! Now POOP is a noun, an adjective, and a prefix to any and every sentence, every single day. (They are four!) I’m not sure when this word trickled in our vocabulary but sometimes it became the funniest word in existence.

2. Brothers got each other’s back

They guard each other and care for each other with an intense sorta passion I’ve never witnessed before. I’ve seen them frantically search for each other on the playground. I’ve watched when one gets a scrape and the other bends down to comfort his brother by saying, “Where’s that smile, Bubba? Don’t you smile?!” The love between the two of them is a sibling bond, a twin bond, a male-twin-bond that seems positively unbreakable.

3. WrestleMania

Boys FIGHT, wrestle, and beat each other up. They pick and poke and kick and trip and tickle and it. never. stops. From the moment they wake up from the moment their heads hit the pillow they are constantly, constantly, trying to “battle” each other over something. This is fun for them. This is actually how they show love and bond with each other. Let them wrestle.

4. Boys First Love: Their Mommas!

With a fierceness. With a protective sorta passion that is ingrained in them, they love their mommas. Go with it. Harbor it. Cherish it!! That is my FAVORITE thing and the thing that bonds my sons and I together. I can foresee into the future little instances of their protective instincts, and it simply makes my heart explode with pride! Like when we rock hunt and there is a “killer ant” coming!! “Watch out for that KILLER ANT MOMMY!! It is HUGE!! I will protect you!!”

5. They are BIG

They have big giving hearts, huge intelligent brains, and big strong muscles. They want to try all of these out, and make sure you let them. Our little dudes love to help with chores (big strong chores) if you direct them. They love to give back if you show them how to care for people in a big way. And most of all, they love to learn. They love to be “big” to act “big” and follow in “big” footsteps. Make sure we are all setting positive examples for all these strong young men to follow in so that they can help make our world a better place.

Mikenzie Oldham is a full-time twin mommy, a full-time wife, a full-time employee, a full-time maid, a full-time chef, and a full-time writer. Juggling life as twin mommy in a kid-centric world, she survives all this with a steady intake of caffeine and wine. She has perfected the phrase “don’t hit your brother” and her main expertise is cleaning mud out of someone’s ear, kissing “owies” and finding four shoes. Check out all her boys’ shenanigans at meandallmyboys.wordpress.com.

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