Last updated on January 24th, 2024 at 06:53 pm
Where I grew up, in Spain, children are raised by their parents (of course) but also by everybody else: grandparents, neighbors, relatives, friends, even unknown people you meet on the bus.
So I thought parenting was an easy and very instinctual thing. We had visited friends with little children many times so before having our own kids I had pretty clear ideas what I would NEVER do when I was a mom. Here are my top 10 things I said I wouldn’t do when I had kids (before I had kids!)
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1. I Will Not Talk About Poop
Well… not only do I compare my twins’ poops but I also talk about their consistency, frequency, color, and smell.
2. I Will Not Have Dirty Kids
My kids will always be perfectly clean. Wearing perfectly ironed clothes, matching their shoes, with perfect haircuts, and smelling like perfume. Well… while I do put a dab of cologne on them every morning… other than that is not that easy to keep two 3 year old toddlers (who love to play with mud) clean. And who has time to iron???
3. I Will Not Read Books About Parenting
Well… not only do I read books, I buy magazines, Google any small symptom of illness, and have an app that tells me a funny parenting fact every day.
4. I Will Not Let Myself Go
I will not keep any of my pregnancy weight and always be perfectly manicured. Well… I did not gain any weight because I had to stay on bed rest for the last two months, so I weighed less after giving birth than before getting pregnant. But everybody kept telling me you have to eat and drink a lot if you are breastfeeding. Since I was up all night for the first two months after they were born, I ate all night long and I am now 20 pounds over my usual weight. Which is OK with me. If only I had time to do some sports… I really miss that. Plus getting my nails done is a miracle; I am happy enough if I get to cut them every now and them. Same thing with going to the hairdresser, buying fancy new clothes, etc.
5. I Will Not Spoil Them
They will not eat sweets, they will not watch TV, and they won’t have tons of toys. Well… they do watch TV (we try to limit it to the weekends), they also eat sweets (especially when we visit the grandparents), and they do have tons of toys. I can’t help it, there are so many cute things! Besides, if they were girls I’d probably spend the money on cute outfits and hairpins, but for two boys I just love getting blocks, books, balls, cars…
6. They Will Not Be My Only Topic of Conversation
Well… it’s difficult to talk about anything else when at the beginning they keep you occupied 24 hours a day! What are you going to talk about then? And you feel compelled to talk with others about them to check if you are doing everything correctly.
7. They Will Not Do Dangerous Things
Well… our boys are really active and they love being outside, climbing, and exploring. Even I do “dangerous” things, like riding the bike to work and pulling a trailer with the twins inside.
8. I Will Not Compete With Other Moms and Compare My Kids With Other Kids
Well… not only do I tell my friends with kids “my boy can do this and that already” but I also compare them to each other.
9. I Will Not Ask Them to Kiss Relatives and Friends
Well… how can I not tell them to kiss a friend goodbye when their cute little cheeks are just so kissable? I should mention that I did not like to kiss other people when I was a little girl and I don’t want them to turn out like me!
10. I Will Not Write a Blog
Well… no comments on that ! 🙂
Marta Tolosa is a native of Spain and has been living in Germany for the last 12 years, where she met her American husband and raises her twin 22-month-old boys (who have 3 nationalities!) She studied computer science and works in IT. She likes to watch romantic comedies and walk back home from the movie theater.
